Pastafarianism is a religion that worships the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM), a divine and all-knowing entity made of spaghetti and meatballs. This divine creature created the universe and all that is in it, including humanity.
Pastafarians believe that the FSM's Noodly Appendage is the source of all comfort and inspiration, and that by embracing His love and His Noodly embrace, we can achieve enlightenment.
I am almost certain that upon seeing this work you will have His blessing.
In Pastafarianism, "Ramen" is often used as a metaphor for the idea of "heaven." According to Pastafarian beliefs, when one dies, they will be transported to a heaven-like afterlife where they will enjoy a never-ending feast of delicious Ramen noodles.
Our glorious FSM has long and sinewy Noodely Appendages like strands of spaghetti, yet strong and supple like a serpent. And this Appendage did writhe and twist in the air, moving with a grace beyond mortal ken.
And the faithful did tremble before the sight, for they knew that the Noodly Appendage was the hand of the Almighty, the means by which He shaped the universe and all that was in it.
Truly, the Noodly Appendage of the Flying Spaghetti Monster was a sight to behold, and it filled the hearts of His faithful with both wonder and fear.
The pirates are "absolutely divine beings" and were the real original Pastafarians. It’s quite trivial to check that since the pirates disappear, the global warming accelerates…
Now you understand why you have to protect them, celebrate the FSM and become a pirate.
Try! (if you don't like this, your old religion will most likely take you back)
As a religion, Pastafarianism has some unique rituals and customs, such as the wearing of colanders on one's head (to show one's devotion to the FSM) and the celebrating of "Holiday," which involves feasting on pasta and meatballs.
With this preview, you should be able to recognize what belongs to the divinity or humanity. What is sacred or what is very sacred or what is very very sacred.
Then, you will be able to shout to the world habemus pastam!
Next time, I may tell you about the 8 I’d Really Rather You Didn’ts. But that's another story!
